Why your pursuit of happiness may never make you happy?
So commonly frequented on many a’ list of goals, the words “Happiness” or “To be truly happy”. It saddens me to think that so many people feel the need to identify this as a goal to be achieved or an outcome to arrive at. Ironically the pursuit itself, misguided placement of the concept and seeking happiness within a predetermined outcome, another person, an event, an achievement or in itself a destination to stumble across can be detrimental. It could be holding you back and even limiting your ability to be happy within each moment.
Happiness is a State of Mind not a Predetermined Outcome.
It’s the damaging thought process that when “this” happens I will reach a point of happiness. Unfortunately this may not necessarily be the case; you could achieve something, experience something, meet someone, but because it wasn’t what you had initially set out to achieve or had intended, what was meant to be a source of joy ends up as disappointment replaced with an undesired outcome.
Quite often people using happiness as a goal never really achieve it because how do you measure happiness? It is a choice made not a measurable outcome.
Every day I choose to be happy when I could so easily be sad or upset. My lifestyle is difficult at times, flying for almost an entire day, waking up at the crack of dawn and not getting to sleep until the following morning is hard. Arriving to an empty and lonely hotel room, when you’d much rather be arriving to your loved ones. I could definitely choose to be upset and sad about that and trust me I have been a few times. However it is a conscious decision that I make instead to be happy to have a room where people may normally pay hundreds of dollars to stay, happy to have the chance to be in another country, happy for the opportunities, happy for knowing what solitude feels like enabling me to appreciate the moments I get with loved ones.
For the next time you’re setting goals remember that happiness is not something to be achieved or arrived at its something you choose every day. Choose happiness during your beginning, middle and end. Your entire process is something to be happy about, the decision to start something is ample reason to be happy, the people you meet, the small wins and the big ones, the places you’ll go, and your end result can make you happy too.
You may not be where you want in life but each moment you have in this life is worth being happy for. Why not find happiness as often as you can and not just as a final destination! Because one day you might wake up dead without having the chance again (lol).